Well... It's Here!

Only two days left until my 36th b-day on Thursday. WAIT!... Before you wish me a happy birthday, there's nothing happy about it. I was supposed to be pg. And if turning yet another year older isn't bad enough, then there's mother's day on Sunday. Way back when this IVF stuff began, this week was the week that I had been either waiting on or dreading. And now that it's here, it's as bad as I had imagined. I just don't want to be here. I want it to be next week already. Every year, I seem to have a lot of anxiety about my birthday, and it's gotten worse since we found about our IF. Before, I guess I just didn't like being the center of attention or that people do stuff just for me. Now, it's a whole other can of worms.

On top of all this, there's DH's DD. I surely hope she doesn't wish me a happy mothers day or even worse, do something for me on this particular day... crap! How am I supposed to deal with it if she does?

I guess I'll just lean on my ol' friend... avoidance.