Thursday, January 31, 2008

Trigger Time

Trigger went good last nite (I think). I didn't feel it at all. DH did a good job, except I think he missed the upper outer quadrant. He went more to the upper inside quadrant - or well, right on the centerline between the two, but there is nothing we can do about it now. I'm trying not to obsess about it. The spot is a little sore this morning, but other than that... nada. I was thinking that I felt some egg maturing going on during the nite, but I think it was just gas (as I found out later)... hahahaha. Na, but really, I have been quite tender in that area since yesterday morning, and even more so this morning. I am ripening up! hahaha. Anyway, more about the event...

8:40 pm: I finally decide it is time to go get the syringe, the needle, the alcohol and the trigger vials.

8:45 pm: Table has been rubbed down w/ alcohol, clean paper towel is laid out w/ all shot supplies displayed for me to begin mixing (vials have been swabbed w/ alcohol as well). (a few deep breaths - watch a little tv for a minute or so)

8:50 pm: I begin, now starting to panic (no reason, just nerves). I get the water in the powder and swoosh it around for a minute or two. I look at it and swoosh some more just to make sure. Then I begin to withdraw the medicine into the syringe when I realize that the needle won't reach to the bottom of the vial like it will with the stim vials. Oh no, how do I get it all out. I turn it on it's side, bending the needle a good bit, but still not getting it all. So then I turn the vial upside down, but I'am afraid to pull the needle back. What if I pull it out too far? Anyway, I finally get it all out. I had to carefully pull the needle out to just before pulling it out of the vial (yikes). Ok, so on to changing to the injection needle and getting the air out.

8:55 pm: Shot is ready. DH gets out of his recliner. I pull my pants down to expose my right rump. He rubs it down with the alcohol. We discuss where to do it (or more like, debate where to do it). Finally, I say, "just do it". But then I realize it is only 8:56 pm... "WOAH! STOP! We still have 4 minutes!" DH laughs. I reminded him that they said, "9 pm SHARP", not 8:56 pm. So we stand there for 4 minutes counting down, "3 minutes", "2 minutes - don't go anywhere", "1 minute - come here". Finally, "It's time, It's time!... Do It. I don't care where, just DO IT!"

9:01 pm: It's done. I didn't feel a thing, and the whole time I reassured him that I couldn't feel it (just in case he was worrying that he was hurting me). I remind him to count to 5 real slow before pulling it out and to make sure it's all gone. So, he does and we're done. I rub it in for a few minutes, and I tell him that it still doesn't hurt, I'm just rubbing it in. He's so proud, he did it!

That's it. Done. Now, just ripen up little eggs. Retrieval is tomorrow.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

3rd and Final Follicle Count!

Today's appointment went pretty good. Still only 7 follicles, but I didn't really expect any more. I was just hoping they would grow and they did. On the right, we have an 18 and a 13, and on the left, an 18, a 17, 2 - 14's and a 9. So, I am to do one more night of stims (3 Bravelle and 1 Menopur) and then trigger tomorrow (Wednesday) night at 9pm. Retrieval will be 8 am on Friday (we have to be there at 7 am). He said we should get 6 eggs and seemed quite optimistic about it. I guess that's as good as it gets, so I'll take it. I can't believe it is finally here. It is so surreal. Yeaaaa!!

Oh, wanted to mention... funny awkward elevator moment this morning. So I guess it was "Everybody Who Is PG To Go See The Doctor Day." And, of course, they all looked miserable to be in such condition (ARGH - rolling my eyes here). Anyway, there were three waiting w/ lil ole me for the elevator. When it finally arrived, yet another pg gal got off the elevator (looking aggravated as well to be inconvenienced w/ her condition). So, we (me and the 3 pg's) get on the elevator. They all hit the floor numbers that they needed. I hit the one I needed (which the RE's office is the only thing on that floor - so it's known for what it is). So, we all start up in silence (as it usually is on an elevator) me w/ my 7 quiet little follicles and they w/ their protruding bellies, and it stops on a floor below ours. One of the RE's (that I have yet to meet) got on. I guess it was from the surgery floor or something. He looked to hit the floor number and saw that it was already lit up. He then looked at each of the three bellies and then to me and my non-belly. Anyway, one of the pg's started talking to him, b/c I guess she was an infertile too and knew him. He congratulated her as the elevator came to a stop on our floor. He looked at me and then gave me a careful smile as I got off the elevator w/ him. Funny, what do you say at that point? I just smiled w/ my tired, longing eyes and walked down the hallway and into the waiting room. All in all, I guess looks can be deceiving, b/c one of the pg's was actually an infertile.

Edited: I need to add that the pg infertile's face lit up when she started talking to the RE. She was so proud. And inside, I was proud for her...

Monday, January 28, 2008

2nd Follicle Count

Ok, I called the nurse this morning to find out what my E2 was from Friday and to get a re-rundown of my follicles and lining. My E2 was 358 and lining was a 7T (which she said was progressing good). My follicles were, on the right, a 13 and a 7 (don't know what happened to the 3rd one from before - maybe it was hiding), and on the left, a 9, 10, 2 - 8's and a 7. Anyway, I'm feeling better about the number of follicles, because maybe they'll be really good quality and like everyone says, "it only takes one."

Friday, January 25, 2008

Not Too Good

Well, I had relatively high hopes until today. My RE said that I would probably only get about 5 eggs. Which he said was low for my age (35). And that means there probably won't be any to freeze (ya think - HELLO). He upped the Bravelle to 5 and Menopur stays at 1. DAMN IT!!! Apparently, I'm a poor responder and/or my ovarian reserve is running out. Not sure how many follicles in total, I think still around 7 or maybe 8. I'll have to call the nurse Monday for a review. I was in shock as he was measuring b/c it was so quick. On the right, I think there was a 13, and a couple of 8's and on the left a couple of 8's, a 9, and a 10. I am hoping that he is just being conservative so that I won't expect too much at retrieval, which he said will probably be on Thursday. I am trying to keep an open mind that there are still 4 days (injections) before I go back in on Tuesday, and that a lot can happen between now and then. Anyway, he said I could blame heredity on the fact that maybe I wasn't born with as many eggs as some people. And that I could blame it on my Mom (who was sitting right there). That kinda pissed me off b/c the poor woman is a cry waiting to happen type person (me too). But he kinda played it off that there is nothing that can be (or could have been) done about it. It's just the way it is. So, when I got home I had to order more Bravelle. $499.00 plus $10 for Saturday delivery b/c I don't have enough to make it through til Monday. DAMN IT! Ok,,, so here are the remnants of my Friday nite cocktail...


I wish this stuff would give you a buzz. It would be so much more fun.

Fun, fun... :)

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

There Were Actually 7


I called the nurse to ask her about my E2 and follicle count. I figure what the heck... anyway, my E2 yesterday was 34 and I actually had 7 follicles... on the right 7, 5, 5 mm and on the left 5, 5, 5, 4 mm. She didn't seem to excited or worried about anything. I had to pull info out of her like pulling teeth. She said my E2 would catch up and that it was still early, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, we'll see Friday.

Oh, I was joking this past weekend that I had a $200 a day "habit." But then after my doctor appt. yesterday, I now have a $250 a day "habit." Oh boy, it's mind blowing when you look at it that way. And that's not even counting the Lupron. Heck, it's trivial compared to the Bravelle and Menopur.

Is there any reason to keep the extra vials of sterile water or the Q-caps? Do they recycle any of this stuff? Or is it just added to the land fills? Such a waste.

Monday, January 21, 2008

How Quickly It Goes


I want to say a special thank you to my MIL. It is because of her frugality throughout her whole life that allowed her to save her money so much so that she was able to give us the money for this adventure. And it is so shocking how quickly it goes flying out the window. Here is a quick rundown of costs from the 1st RE consult to the present. Oh, BTW, I just ordered more Bravelle and Menopur for a measly total of $998. Anyway, I'm going to start with that and go back in time...

01/21 Meds - more Bravelle & Menopur 998.00
01/17 IVF Start Appointment 9,560.00
01/08 HIV & Hep Lab & Nurse visit 120.00
01/12 HIV & Hep Lab fees 463.26
01/08 Semen Analysis 95.00
12/18 Meds - Bravelle, Menopur, etc. 1,596.34
12/13 Sono HSG / TT/ Nurse consult 335.00
12/18 Meds - doxycycline for him & BCP's 34.12
_________
Total for IVF $13,201.72

Now, let's go back some more...

09/27 Laparoscopy - hospital fee 4,739.08
RE's fee 2,000.00
Anesthesiologist's fee 492.00
Pathologist's fee 135.00
Pain meds 10.08
09/19 Pre-op 70.00
_________
Total for Lap $7,446.16

09/07 HSG - hospital fee 708.60
RE's fee 250.00
Doxycycline 6.13
_________
Total for HSG $964.73


GRAND TOTAL to DATE $21,612.61

Keep in mind that a lot of these I either paid up front and/or called and asked for a discount. It really works, you'd be surprised. Also, see my "Hardship Letter" post.

Of course, this doesn't include gas (2 hour drive one way), food, prenatal vitamins and other misc expenses, etc, etc. Dang it just flies right out the bank account doesn't it... Geeeees! I'm tired now, headache even worse.... argh.

1st Follicle Count


Everything went well today. I guess I have 6 total follicles. He counted out loud to the nurse... "on the right... we have 7, 5, 5 and on the left... we have 5, 5, 4." I didn't ask any questions. He turned the screen my way to show me what they look like. It's so cool, my body is doing something "super" as in superovulation. Anyway, he upped my Bravelle from 3 to 4 vials and the Menopur will stay the same at 1 vial. Things are about to really get going... woohoo. And I will still do the 10 units of Lupron in the mornings. Next appointment... this Friday 01/25.

Still fighting the headache... Lupron, I guess.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Green Light ... GO!!!


It was my ivf start appt yesterday and apparently it was everyone elses as well. The waiting room was as full as i have ever seen it. There were at least 10 boxes of meds there, mine included. That was a waste, the instructions tell you to bring all of your meds with you to this appt. so that the nurse can make sure you have enough. She didn't even bat an eye at them. Anyway, my ovaries looked good and they expect my estrogen to be good, so I got the green light to start stims. 3 bravelle and 1 menopur in the afternoons and continue 10 units of lupron in the mornings... next appt. monday 01/21.

Oh, and they said "No" to the Tylenol Sinus. Only "Tylenol" is allowed... bitches,,, na, j/k. They really are great and super nice. Anyway, headache is finally easing up. I guess 24 Tylenol will eventually do the trick. Hahahaha, na, I haven't taken quite that many.

First mixing of meds went ok. After all, it was my first time, but I got it eventually. Injection went smoothly. DH was there (first time for him). He, of course, was trying to tell me how to do it like he is a pro or something. I had to politely tell him to shut it. Anyway, I think I'll try a Q-cap this afternoon. I mean, hey, they came with the meds. If it will make it any easier, I'm there.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

The Visitor aka Aunt Flo


Well, AF is showing up right on time... 4 days past last BCP. They said it should show up within 3-5 days after last BCP. And just like me, I'm right on track along with a few cramps, nothing too bad. I do have this horrible sinus headache. The weather has changed and man ole man do I have a headache. Last night I gave in and took Tylenol sinus because I didn't have any regular Tylenol. Anyway, it worked beautifully, but now my headache is back. So I went to the pharmacy earlier and got some regular Tylenol, but it hasn't worked. I guess I'll have to tough it out b/c my instructions say "Tylenol is allowed but aspirin, ibuprofen, non-steroidal anti-inflammatories, and cough/cold formulas ARE NOT." Is Tylenol sinus one of these? I guess I'll find out tomorrow. You know, wait, let me call... ...... Crap! I should have known better. I got the nurse's voicemail and then it cut me off before I could even get my number out. I didn't say anything except "this is so and so and I have a couple of questions about my IVF start appt. tomorrow morning" and then beeeeep and then some prompts to review, continue or erase and start over. Of course, none of them would respond when I hit the corresponding numbers! Great!!! I don't know if she'll get it or what. Ok, so I just called back and left nothing but my name and number... done. Anyway, now I wait.

*I say Tylenol, but I buy the generic. It's just easier to say Tylenol than acetaminophen.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Nurse Me


OMG! I am Horrible! I just cannot get anything done today!!! My brain just will not get off of this IVF thing. I have googled and yahooed and clicked on the blogs I read over and over and over. ARGH!!! I am obsessed, I swear!... I have got to get out of here and away from this computer! The latest, I just pulled out my meds and looked over them all... Again, for the 20 millionth time! I feel like my very own nurse... Nurse Me. I've never been interested in the medical field b/c I don't think I could take the blood and guts, but I think after all this, I could be a really good IVF nurse coordinator. It really is super neat, and I've done so much research. Na, I'm just rambling, but needles are getting less scary.

Anyway, somebody put a website link in one of their posts where you can follow blogs without having to click on each one individually. Does anyone know what it is?

No other dilemmas to report, just waiting on Thursday to get here.

:)

Monday, January 14, 2008

Morphology?


Oh, I forgot to mention that when I got the results of the SA this past Friday, the nurse made the statement that the number of sperm was good, but the shape of some of them was not too good. She also said they weren't bad but that we may have to do ICSI which will be an additional $1,500... Great! Wonderful! (I'm being sarcastic & rolling my eyes here.)

But on a positive note, our HIV and Hepatitis tests were negative... YEAAA! (Not that we were really worried - but we weren't worried about the SA either and look where that has gotten us.)

Thanks you guys for all the wonderful and supportive comments.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Piece of Cake


First Lupron shot... done! It was not bad at all. It did itch for about 5 minutes afterwards, but I just massaged the spot a little bit. Now it's gone. Well, there is a slight little bump there, i'm sure it's normal. Anyway, I just got through finding my meds their own little spot in a basket in the bathroom linen closet. They have been just hanging around on the table in the Fed-Ex box til now.

I am officially a member of the club. I must say, one club that I would rather not be a member of, but such is life. Up until now, I have just been talking about it. Now, I'm doing it, yikes.

Ok, that's it for now... bye.

Friday, January 11, 2008

Decaf Coffee...


Well I took the plunge. It was either cut coffee out all together or switch to decaf. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not a big coffee drinker. I usually only drink 1 or 2 cups in the morning. So for the last few mornings I have just not drank any coffee at all to see if I could just not drink it at all. Well, I haven't felt myself, so, yesterday I bought a bag of decaf. I just made the first pot, which is only a 4 cup pot. I had to first stop and smell the aroma when I opened the vacuum bag. It was ok, even good. Then, as it was brewing, I noticed it was still smelling pretty good. I fixed my first cup, took a deep breath and then a careful sip.... I must say it is pretty dang good. I can't believe it... YEAAAA, I can keep coffee! I guess I have been sort of paranoid that it would suck because one time at work (one time at band camp - hahaha), I tried some decaf, and I don't know it was too strong or the brand or what, but it was not good at all. In fact, it was down right horrible. I swore from then on that regular coffee was the only way to go. Well my friends, I have turned that page in my head. I am sooo relieved.

Now, on to iced tea. This will probably not be as easy. Down here in the South, it is all about iced tea now. Sweet Iced Tea. I think I am going to start with switching out one of the three family sized bags of regular with decaf and see how that goes. Who knows, maybe it will not be noticeable.

Anyway, t-minus 24 hours and counting until my first injection of Lupron.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

The Deed Was Done!


Much to my DH's desire I was able to go in the little room with him. But man, talk about a sterile environment. I don't know what I was expecting. I guess maybe a low lit room with a comfy recliner or couch and a tv w/ porn videos and magazines. For some reason I was also picturing a disco ball (don't ask me why). You know, it just seems to fit in with the 70's porn music and low lighting in my head. Anyway, it turned out to be a tiny bathroom with a million watts of fluorescent lighting. There was a tv w/ vcr & tapes & magazines in the corner, but the tv was one of those teensy tiny ones w/ a built-in vcr... it's a wonder any man is able to produce a "sample." Oh, and the chair... it was a measily folding chair! YES, a FOLDING CHAIR. We both bout fell out (w/ laughter). Anyway, I got to use that folding chair while he stood up for the whole event. So, I took my shirt off just in case he missed the cup. I could just see me having to walk back into the waiting room with a freshly tried to wash it out shirt - oh the horror! And about 10 minutes later, after a gag or two (b/c he tried to shove it down my throat) we rang the little door bell for the little Chinese guy to get it from the pass window. I think he is the head Embryologist - top notch too - but we could hardly understand him - which is too funny in itself. We (DH especially) are Southern people. Anywhere we go outside of the Southeast USA, people don't understand us and vice versa. So when the lil 4' Chinese guy came to get us to go to the little room, we had to ask him to repeat everything... well, DH did. I was hanging back in the hallway trying to not be embarrassed by my going in with him.

Then it was on to bloodwork. That all went smoothly and the nurse who stuck us was very nice and pleasureable. We decided while we were there to see one of the IVF nurses to sign all the consent forms, and I'm glad we did too. My DH's work is weird and there is a chance that he may not be able to take off work to be there for retrieval and produce a fresh sample. I asked if the sample would be frozen (I thought that I had read that they freeze it automatically in case something happens on retrieval day - but they don't!). So, the nurse immediately went to the lab and checked to see if it was too late to freeze them. They were still on the warmer and we decided to have them frozen just in case. WOOSH!... one more stress taken care of.

When we got home, I went down the "Checklist for IVF Start" and was able to check everything that was left. Soooo, now I AM READY! :)

Monday, January 7, 2008

Bloodwork and SA


Tomorrow we go to the RE's office for some mandatory testing. DH gets to supply a specimen for a semen analysis, and we both get to give some blood for HIV screening and Hepatitis panel testing. He is hoping that I will get to go in the little room with him to "help" produce his specimen, but I don't think I will be allowed in there. Either way, it's one more step in this process that is finally here. I just have a question... how the hell am I supposed to concentrate on work or anything else. This is just so all consuming, argh! Oh well, it's exciting more though. One good thing is that the weather has warmed back up... thankfully! We worked in the yard yesterday in shorts and flip-flops..... YEAAA! (yeaaa to the shorts and flip-flops, no yeaaa to the yard work - friggin leaves!)

Friday, January 4, 2008

Waiting and Freezing


I had a good post earlier. But I got side tracked and now I've forgotten it. Ok, maybe it wasn't a "good" post or I wouldn't have forgotten it, right? You got me. Anyway, not much to report other than it's friggin freezin down here. I am way down South, it's just not supposed to get this cold. I am sooo ready for spring and warmer weather. Only one more week until I start Lupron. Woohoo!!!